At Your Side
by BubblyShell22
Summary: I always thought Leo was invincible, but seeing him lying in this broken state showed me that he ain't invincible, and I don't like it one bit. Takes place after Tales of Leo.
1. Chapter 1

At Your Side

Chapter 1: Vigil

A/N: This little plot bunny bit me this weekend, and I thought I'd put it up. I really wanted to do something different concerning this plot. I've already done the aftermath of Leo's attack from Leo's perspective, so I thought it would be cool to do it from Raph's perspective instead. It would give me a chance to branch out a bit and write from Raph's POV rather than just making another Leo-centric story. I'm not sure how frequent the updates are going to be, but I'll try and keep it as consistent as I can even though I have other stories I'm doing as well. I hope you enjoy this though.

Disclaimer: I don't own the TMNT or any related characters. They're property of Nickelodeon Studios.

Summary: I always thought Leo was invincible because he could handle anything. But seeing him lying here in this broken state showed me that he ain't invincible, and I didn't like it one bit. Takes place after Tales of Leo.

"The danger has passed. Now we must let him rest."

Relief shot through me at Splinter's words because it meant Leo would be okay. I still couldn't understand why this happened to him. I always though Leo was invincible because he could handle anything that was thrown at him. Show him how to do a kata, and he'd mimic you perfectly. Ask him to play a game with you, and he'd show you how to win. But seein' him lyin' here in this broken state showed me that he ain't invincible, and I didn't like it one bit. I couldn't wait to get my hands on the punks who did this to my brother. Just the thought of it made me feel good. At least I could get revenge on someone.

Everyone else was leavin' the room. I was about to leave myself, but I thought it would be a good idea to let Leo know I was there for him. "Hey, Leo, if you need anythin', I'll be right outside." I knew he was asleep, but I could tell he heard me and that he understood. That made me feel better already.

April decided we needed to eat since we hadn't had anythin' since those scrambled eggs Mikey cooked. They'd stopped at the store before we came here, so we had quite a bit of food. April though sandwiches would be a good idea, so she made them according to what we wanted. When we first came here, I wasn't in the mood to eat, but now that Leo was gonna be okay, I decided to have some food to keep up my strength. We didn't really talk much since there wasn't much to say at the moment. Casey tried to talk about sports to see if he could weasel a conversation out of me, but I didn't bite. My eyes constantly traveled to where Leo was lyin' so that I could listen to see if he needed me. Casey saw that and stopped tryin' to talk to me.

After we ate, Splinter suggested we all get some rest. I wanted to stay by Leo's side in case he needed me, but Sensei insisted that I go upstairs to sleep. Now, normally, I wouldn't fight my dad on this, but this time I made an exception. I had made a promise to Leo, and I was willin' to keep it.

"Sensei, I made a promise that I'd be there if he needed me!" I protested.

"Yes, but you need your rest, Raphael," Splinter insisted. "I will stay with your brother and alert you if anything goes wrong. I am sure Leonardo will understand."

"Don't fight it, bro," Mikey urged me. "You know that if Leo could, he'd be telling you to go to bed himself."

I smiled at the thought of Leo tellin' me to go to bed in that pain-in-the-ass tone of his. Right now, I'd give anythin' to hear that, but I knew he wasn't in any shape to be givin' orders. And I knew if I argued with Sensei, it would mean havin' to do fifty flips for punishment. So I bowed to Splinter to acknowledge his order and went upstairs. Don and Mikey were roomin' together, which meant that I'd be roomin' with Leo when he was fit enough to come upstairs. For some reason, it didn't bother me. Maybe it was because I'd be able to really keep an eye on him and make sure he didn't get into trouble. Wow. I never thought I'd have that thought before.

I actually did get some sleep for a little while but woke up when I had a nightmare. It was basically about Leo crashin' in the window, but instead of him wakin' up like he did, he never woke up again. I sat bolt upright at the thought. Splinter did say he'd be okay, didn't he? But what if there was some sorta complication? I'd seen it on so many emergency room shows. The patient seemed okay and then somethin' happened to them where the doctors had to try and save them. Could that happen to Leo? I knew I wasn't allowed to check on him, but that dream really had me feelin' scared. I went downstairs as quietly as I could and went to where Leo was. I expected to see Splinter there keepin' watch like he said he would, but he wasn't there. Where the shell was he? Had the Foot come back and taken him? No, Sensei would've alerted us to that, and we would've heard them breakin' in.

I made my way to Leo's side when he started thrashin' around. At first I thought maybe he was havin' some sorta seizure and was ready to shout for Don when I heard Leo mutterin' in his sleep. Now, I knew people who had seizures didn't do that based on all the medical shows I'd seen. I went to my brother's side and gently shook him, tryin' to get him to wake up.

"Leo, wake up, bro," I urged him. "You're safe now." I was afraid it wasn't gonna work, but then Leo jerked upright and hissed in pain. I gently held him up and rubbed some soothing circles on his shell to calm him down. "It's okay, bro," I said. "I've got ya."

At first, Leo wasn't sure what was goin' on until he turned towards me. "Raph, what are you doing here?" he asked weakly. "Where's Sensei?"

"I dunno," I replied. "I came down here to check on you and didn't see him." I was about to say more when I heard the toilet flush. Okay, that explained it. Sensei had to use the toilet.

When Splinter came back I expected him to tear me a new one for comin' down to check on Leo, but he didn't. Instead he asked, "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, Sensei, everythin's fine," I replied. "Leo had a nightmare, but I woke him up."

"You heard me from all the way up there?" Leo asked me.

I could've just said that I had, but I couldn't lie to Leo or to Sensei about this. "No, I came down 'cause I had a bad dream and wanted to check on you," I said. "That's when I saw Sensei wasn't in the room. Then you were thrashin' and I came to wake you up. At first, I thought you were havin' a seizure."

"What was your dream about, Raphael?" Splinter asked me.

Man, I didn't want to say anythin' about my dream, but I knew if I didn't, Splinter would keep proddin' me. So, I told them what happened and how I felt I needed to check on Leo. Neither of them said a word, but Leo did give me a look of sympathy. Yeah, as if I needed Fearless's sympathy for anythin'.

"And what was your dream about, Leonardo?" Splinter asked him.

"The attack," Leo replied. Of course Leo wasn't gonna lie to Splinter. He was too goody-goody for that.

Splinter mused about this for a few minutes. "It seems as though you both had dreams that manifested from your fears," he said. "Raphael, your dream indicates that you feared for your brother's well-being and that you felt the need to make sure he was alright. Leonardo, your dream indicates your fear of what you went through during the attack and facing the unknown."

"So, what's the point?" I asked. I didn't need Splinter to tell me what my dream was about. I knew it was about Leo and how scared I was. Yeah, I never liked to admit it, but this time, I could feel it.

"My point is that I may have been wrong before," Splinter replied. "Raphael, I think it would be best if you stayed with your brother tonight. Perhaps it will help both of you if you talked to each other about this."

Even though I was glad I'd be able to stay with Leo for the rest of the night, I wasn't too thrilled with havin' to talk to him. I was afraid it would lead to a fight, and that was somethin' Leo didn't need right now after all he'd been through. Still, maybe it would be a good thing and would strengthen our bond or somethin' like that. Shell, we never had much of a bond like we used to when we were younger. We were always clashin' over somethin'. Leo would say I'm too rash and make foolish decisions. I'd retort that he's a smartass and too bossy for his own good. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my bro. I really do, and he loves me. It's just that we've never really showed it to each other. Maybe now was the time to do that.

"Yes, Master Splinter," we both said.

"Good," Splinter replied. "I will see you in the morning."

After he left, I gently settled Leo back against his pillow and took the chair that was by the couch. I moved it a bit closer so I could be ready if Leo needed me again.

"Thanks, Raph," he said softly. "I owe you one."

"Don't mention it," I said gruffly. "I'm just glad you're okay, Fearless."

A look of pain crossed his face when I said that. "Raph, don't call me that," he pleaded. "I'm not fearless. I never have been."

"Yes, you are," I insisted. "You never back down from anythin' that's thrown at you. Just because you were scared of heights as a kid, it don't mean that you ain't fearless. You conquered that fear and mastered it. Shell, you faced down Shredder's army of ninjas and kept on fightin' them. You could've called us for backup, but you didn't do it. You tried to take them down on your own because you wanted to protect us. Look, you may be scared now, and I don't blame ya for it, but you'll master this fear, too. And if you need help, I'm right here. Sensei helped ya with your fear of heights and I'll help ya with this fear."

I think Leo was surprised that I said that. "Thanks, Raph," he said again. "Now, it's your turn to lecture me on how dumb I was."

"Not gonna happen, bro," I replied. "Ya didn't know what those guys were gonna do. You were just on a simple trainin' run. Now, if you'd lured them there lookin' for a fight, then I'd have reason to lecture. Then again, maybe I wouldn't because I'd do the same thing."

Leo laughed at that. "Yeah, you probably would," he agreed. Then he became more sober. "It was just scary for me not knowing if I was going to be able to come back to you guys."

I put my arm around him. "Hey, we were just as scared about that," I told him. "Hell, I wanted to go out and look for you, but Splinter wouldn't let me. He told me to stay put, and I did."

"You did?" he asked. "Wow. I never thought you loved me, Raph." He had a teasin' look on his face, and I knew he was jokin' about that last bit.

I laughed, too. "Yeah, me neither," I answered. "I always thought I hated your guts. Guess I was wrong, huh?"

"Yep," he responded. "Maybe getting attacked was a good thing in the end."

I looked at him like he was crazy. "How do you figure that?"

"Because it's brought us closer together," he answered. "On a normal day, we wouldn't be sitting around and talking. We'd be fighting."

"Hey, we can have normal conversations," I insisted. "We don't always fight, Leo."

"You're right, but it feels like we've been fighting more than we've been talking," he insisted.

He had a point there. I'd felt like that, too. "Okay, I get it," I said. "But I'm not gonna think that this attack was a good thing. You're hurt, Leo. They hurt you for no reason."

"There was a reason," he whispered. "It's because I didn't join the Shredder when he asked me. Remember what he said on the roof? He said that those who weren't with him were against him and that he crushed all those who were against him. This is what he meant. He had the Foot attack me to send a message about those who were against him. I deserved this."

I was shocked by his words. "Leo, don't tell me you're thinkin' of joinin' that piece of shit," I said.

"I'm not, Raph," he replied. "I would never join the Foot. I'm just saying that it's karma's way of punishing me for how I acted that day. I was so arrogant and thought I was better than you guys. Maybe this attack was a way to knock me down a peg or two."

"Leo, you don't believe that," I said sternly. "It wasn't karma who did this to you. It was Shredder. And you know what? Karma's gonna come at him in the form of a Turtle named Raphael. He's gonna get an even worse beat down than he gave to you."

"Don't do anything stupid, Raph," Leo warned me. "Now is not the time to be acting alone."

"Who said I was gonna be alone? You know I ain't gonna do anythin' without you guys. You deserve to kick his ass as much as I do."

"Yeah, I guess I do," Leo agreed with me. Then he yawned.

"Better get some sleep, bro," I said. "You're gonna need it to get your strength back. You need anythin' before you go to sleep?"

"Actually, I do need to go to the bathroom," he replied.

I pretended to sigh in annoyance. "Great," I said. "And Don didn't leave ya a bedpan, so I guess that means I gotta cart your ass to the bathroom."

"You're lucky there's a downstairs one then," he teased back. "Better yet, you could be forced to take me outside to an outhouse."

"Yeah, I guess I should be thankful Casey grandparents had the sense to install some bathrooms," I said with a grin. "Okay, let's do this."

Leo nodded and slowly slid his legs forward so that his feet were on the floor. I gently grabbed his right arm and helped him to stand. He was shaky and leaned on me for balance. When I was sure he was okay, I helped him slowly make his way to the bathroom. Leo leaned on me the whole way, and I stayed right by him, encouragin' him the whole way. We made it to the bathroom without incident, and I helped him in and sat him on the toilet.

"You want me to stay in here and wipe your ass when you're done?" I teased him. I was in a good mood for once, and I knew Leo was, too. It felt good to feel like jokin' around.

"No, I think I can handle that part," he teased back. "I'll let you know when I'm done though."

I nodded and left the bathroom. When Leo was done, he called for me, and I went back inside to help him up. I took him to the sink so he could wash his hands (or hand since his left arm was injured). Then we made our slow way back to the couch where I settled Leo back into bed. He thanked me and urged me to get some sleep, too.

I shook my head. "I'm here to keep an eye on you," I insisted. "There ain't no way I'm goin' to bed." Leo didn't argue like I thought he would. He nodded and closed his eyes to try and get some sleep.

I tried to stay awake for him, but I found myself dozin' occasionally before catching myself and jerkin' awake. Leo had another nightmare, but I was right there to calm him down. As I soothed his fears, I could tell that it was gonna be a long road to recovery for my brother. And even though I knew he wasn't invincible, I knew that he could still do it. I'd be there to help him along the way, so we could get our revenge on the jerk who did this to him. As Leo calmed down and settled back down to sleep, I whispered, "I love you, bro. I'm here for you."

"Love you, too, Raph," he whispered back.

As I sat and kept watch over my brother, I knew there was one thing that Shredder couldn't do and that was to keep us apart. I made a promise to always be there for Leo and to act like a better brother to him. I just hoped that I'd be able to keep that promise and never break it. Then again, Leo would always remind me if I did. With that last thought in my head, I let sleep claim me, knowing that if anythin' happened, I'd be able to hear it and be there for my brother.

A/N: So, that's the first chapter. I know there are places where Raph may seem like a jerk, but he's not. It's just that sometimes his thoughts can seem mean when he really doesn't mean to be that way. We've seen that in the cartoon. I hope I did Raph justice and that the Raph fans aren't going to come at me with pitchforks. I don't know when the next chapter will be up, but I'll try and have it up soon. It just depends on if I get ideas for this story or not. Plus, I've got other stories I'm doing, so I'm going to be flip-flopping between those and this one. All I ask is that you try to be patient. Feel free to leave a review, and have a shelltastic day.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Hypocrite

A/N: Yes, I'm back with an update. I had a bit of writer's block, but now things are coming together again, and I decided to update. Thanks to those who have read and reviewed this story thus far. Your kind words and encouragement have been an inspiration to me. Thanks a million. I hope you enjoy this chapter as well.

Disclaimer: See chapter one.

I woke up not feelin' the best. I'd had a hard night's sleep after Leo had the nightmare, and I kept wakin' up to see if he was okay. Thankfully, he slept for the rest of the night. I knew Mikey was gonna tease me about not havin' enough sleep, but I just didn't care. All that mattered was that Leo was okay and that he made it through the night. As soon as I opened my eyes, I saw that he was awake.

"Wow, you look like hell, Raph," he commented. "Why didn't you sleep?"

I couldn't help but laugh at his remark. Here he was after gettin' his ass kicked by the Foot with bruises all over his body, and he was tellin' me I looked like hell. It was kind of ironic if you ask me. "I look a shell of a lot better than you, bro," I replied.

"True," Leo replied. "Are the others up yet?"

"Not that I know of," I answered. "I woulda heard them."

As if on cue, I heard Mikey come thunderin' down the stairs followed by Don, April, and Casey. Master Splinter came out of the guest room downstairs.

Mikey saw that Leo was up and ran over to him. "How are you feeling, bro?" he asked. I knew he wanted to give Leo one of his famous hugs, but he held himself back probably because of how injured Leo was.

"Sore," Leo answered. "I feel like I got hit by a truck or something."

Don put on his doctor face. "You probably have a lot of bruising, Leo," he said. "After breakfast's over, I'm going to give you a bath and then check your wounds."

I stared at Don. "How the shell are we gonna get him into a bathtub?" I asked. "There's no way he can climb all those stairs. Too bad the downstairs bathroom don't have a tub."

"That's where Casey comes in," April replied. "He's going to go and get a portable bathtub and a first aid kit."

"Wait, I don't get to have breakfast with you guys?" Casey whined.

"You can have some after you get back," April answered.

I could tell Casey wasn't happy about it, but he knew he had to do what April said. She concocted a list of items and had Casey go and get them. While he was gone, April took out a carton of eggs she'd gotten earlier on our way up and began to make egg sandwiches. Mikey wanted to help, but April wouldn't let him. I have to say, those sandwiches were damn good. I never knew April could cook so well. When Casey got back, he had a sandwich too, and I could tell he really liked it.

"Babe, you're awesome in the kitchen," he remarked.

April shot him a glare after he called her babe, but he ignored it.

When breakfast was over, we got the portable tub ready for Leo to use. Then Don and I both helped him off the couch and into it. I could tell he wasn't happy to be bathing like this with all of us around him.

"Do I really have to do this in public?" he asked us.

"For now, yes," Don replied. "Only Raph and I will stay here with you. Could the rest of you please leave now?"

The others nodded and retreated elsewhere. Now, let me tell you, I wasn't happy to be given the task of cleaning my brother. It was the most uncomfortable things I've ever done in my life. Sure, we sometimes bathed together when we were little, but that was different. I really didn't enjoy havin' to wash every nook and cranny while Don held Leo up. I kept givin' Leo apologetic glances every time I had to wash a different body part 'cause I knew he didn't like this any more than I did. Once he was cleaned, we lifted him up and dried him off then put him back on the couch. I gave the all clear, and the others came back. I was waitin' for Mikey to tease me to no end about havin' to bathe our brother, but he didn't say a word, which was a big surprise to me. Usually he'd give any chance he could to embarrass me. Maybe it was the circumstances of what had happened to us or somethin' like that. All I know is Mikey kept his mouth shut, and I was glad of that.

Don examined Leo thoroughly and concluded that Leo's injuries weren't life-threatening. He had a broken left arm, so Don made a sling for it. Most of his injuries were bruises, so Don recommended that he put ice on his injuries every twenty minutes, alternating after twenty minutes on one area. Leo indicated that his ribs hurt the most, so Don put the ice pack there first.

"Well, now that we know the extent of Leonardo's injuries and that he will recover, I believe we need to start our practice sessions again," Master Splinter said.

Mikey groaned. "Sensei, do we have to?" he whined. "I mean, isn't this supposed to be a vacation from that?"

"I wouldn't call this a vacation, Mikey," Leo said sternly. "I would rather be healthy than have what happened to me back in New York. And if we're going to face Shredder again, we need to be on top of our game."

Why was he usin' the word "we" when he was talkin' about this? Did he really think he was gonna practice in the shape he was in?

"Leo, you know you can't practice with us," Don reminded him. "You're in no shape for it yet. Besides, you don't even have your swords, so you can't spar with us."

A look of pain crossed Leo's face at Don's words. I felt so sorry for him, but I knew Don was right. There was no way Leo could train with us yet. He wasn't ready.

"I know that, Don," he said. "I was referring to when I become well enough to train. Nevertheless, you three still need to practice even if I'm not there."

I could tell Leo wanted to come with us. This was his life, and he was dedicated to it. I knew it hurt him to be away from practice. "Look, Leo, maybe I could stay with you today," I suggested. "It won't hurt for me to miss one practice."

"No, Raph, you need to train," Leo insisted. "I'll be fine here, okay? April and Casey will be here and can get me anything if I need it."

I knew when Leo used what I liked to call his leader voice that there was no arguin' with him. Besides, I knew Splinter wouldn't let me skip out on trainin', and if I argued with him, I was liable to get flips as a punishment. So, I nodded and followed the others out to the barn. It was pretty big with a coal stove in one corner. There was also a punchin' bag that was hangin' from a rafter, and I assumed it was Casey's from when he used to come here. That was a good thing for me.

Splinter led us through some warm-up stretches to get our muscles loosened up. He said that we weren't learnin' anythin' new because Leo wasn't here, and he didn't want him to fall behind. I normally would've scoffed at this, but I could understand his thinkin'. Leo was the type who always wanted to be the first to learn somethin', and if he fell behind, he'd get upset. That was just the way he was.

So, we went through all of the katas we'd learned since we first started trainin'. I kept imaginin' that my invisible opponents were the Foot Ninjas who'd attacked my brother. It made me angry to think of them, and my attacks got even more forceful than usual. Splinter noticed this because he called a halt to our practice.

"Raphael, you are not focused," he chastised.

That made me mad. "I am focused, Master," I insisted. "I'm focused on kickin' the shell outta those idiots who attacked Leo."

"Yes, but your anger is clouding your mind, and you are not focused on the flow of the kata," Splinter reminded me. "You must learn to relax your mind, my son."

"I can't!" I yelled. "I can't focus my damn mind!"

Don and Mikey gasped at my outburst, and I had a feelin' I was in for it now. Sensei never allowed us to swear in practice or to yell at him either. I braced myself for the punishment, but Splinter just sighed heavily and placed a paw on my shoulder.

"I understand, my son," he said gently. "This has been a terrible ordeal for all of us. We will leave you here to your thoughts. Perhaps if you empty your mind of these thoughts you will do better tomorrow."

"I couldn't believe what he was sayin'. I wasn't gettin' punished? That had to be a first. I watched as Splinter, Don, and Mikey left the barn. While I was glad I didn't have to do flips, I was still confused by all of this. Why was Splinter bein' lenient with me? Was it just because I'd had a rough night, or was there some other motive to his plan?

Shakin' my head, I began another set of katas, once again picturin' the opponents as the Foot Ninjas. Then I moved to the punchin' bag and kept hittin' it with punches and kicks. It felt good to get the anger out, and I was glad I was takin' my anger out on the bag. I must've been out there for a while because suddenly Casey was there watchin' me beat up on the bag.

"Wow, Raph, you must be pretty pissed," he remarked.

I whirled around and glared at him. "What the shell are you doin' here?" I demanded.

"Leo sent me out to get you," Casey replied. "Splinter said you needed to clear your thoughts or somethin' like that. So, what's eatin' you, Raph?"

"It should be obvious, Casey," I replied. "My brother almost died yesterday."

"Yeah, but he's gonna be fine," Casey responded. "There's no need to get depressed anymore because he's still here."

I sighed. "I know that," I said. "I guess I'm just feelin' guilty about what happened. I feel like it's my fault that he got attacked."

Casey gaped at me. "Your fault?" he repeated. "How do you figure that? You were asleep when he went out, right? It's not like ya sent the Foot after him."

"Yeah, I was asleep instead of goin' out with him," I answered. "That's the problem, Case. I shoulda been there for him instead of slackin' off."

"Raph, it ain't your fault," said Casey. "It just happened. Maybe you should talk to Leo about this and see that he doesn't blame you one bit for what happened to him. Even if you'd gone with him, it could've still happened."

I knew Casey was right, and at that moment, I realized that I was a hypocrite. Last night I'd been tellin' Leo not to blame himself for what happened, and here I was blamin' myself for what happened to him. "You're right, Case," I said. "I'm such a damn hypocrite. Maybe I should talk to Leo about this. He needs to know, and so do the others. Thanks for talkin' to me, Case."

Casey punched me in the shoulder. "Hey, no problem, Raph," he said. "It's the least I can do."

I smiled and followed him out of the barn. I did talk to Leo, and he said he could understand how I felt and that I shouldn't blame myself for what happened. Splinter said the same thing, and I assured him that I'd be better tomorrow. He accepted that and said no more about it. Mikey and Don were just glad to see I was okay, and we all had fun playin' a game of cards.

The rest of the day went by pretty quickly. We watched TV for a little while and even went out and had a snowball fight. We took turns spendin' time with Leo so that he had some company. I felt so much better after unloadin' that burden I'd been carryin' around. I was happier than ever and vowed that I would help Leo with whatever he needed. Don said that tomorrow, Leo was gonna begin his physical therapy so that he could start usin' his muscles again. I could tell Leo was nervous about it, but I reassured him that I'd be there if he needed me.

"Thanks, Raph," he said. "I owe you one."

"Don't mention it, bro," I replied. "It's what I'm here for."

As I settled down to sleep (I decided to sleep where Leo was because I didn't feel like goin' upstairs) I realized that Leo and I were more alike than we ever knew before. Both of us tended to place blame on ourselves when things went wrong, and both of us were very protective of the other. I also realized that as we grew older, both of us weren't as close as we sued to be, but that was changin' now. Maybe it was the prospect of almost losin' my brother that made me see how far apart we'd grown and that now was the time for us to stop takin' our relationship for granted and start bein' thankful that we had each other. I was determined to make sure to always be a better brother and to never take Leo for granted ever again.

A/N: And another chapter is done. So, what did you think of it? In the next chapter we'll begin Leo's physical therapy and his slow journey on the road to recovery. Please feel free to leave a review once you've finished reading. Have a shelltastic day.


End file.
